everyone has gone to themselves…
Ξ November 28th, 2007 | → | ∇ General |
I’m sitting in a dark room, with only the sound of my fingers striking the keys (softly, I touch type), the humming of my overworked laptop, and the purring of my cat disturbing the silence of the evening. Everyone has gone off to their activities whatever they are.
Vivianne is laying on her back, lounging like some well-fed grecian princess in my lap. George is not feeling so well and has retreated to his bed, and Elizabeth to hers. Josiah is locked up with Brent in his bedroom playing video games or watching movies. Whatever the Light_Scary_Mother_Fuckers do when alone together.
Shivian and John are probably back at Shivian’s place by now. I imagine buttsex is going to be a big part of their evening, I’m happy for them. Maybe there will be rope involved as well, wouldn’t that be special? Wait… no… that would be typical. What on earth do you call it when the things that most people consider unusual, rare, or unlikely are common-place to you? Seriously, for my friends, sex without rope is kinky and unusual.
So I’ll admit to a little jealousy. Shivian has yet another adoring boy at his beck and call. Josiah and Brent seem to be getting very couply on us (not a bad thing I think). Alex has Samantha. At least George, Elizabeth, and Frank are still single. Not that I wish them ill-luck, but it’s nice to not be the only one not getting lots of sex.
So here’s the rub — I love that term by the way, it’s very british, very posh even — Even if I had the option to have lots of boysex I probably wouldn’t. I truly don’t think that I’m in the right place for carnal knowledge to be a regular feature of my adventures. I think I need time for myself. Time to focus on myself, and the things that I need in life. And I don’t have that time right now. It’s hard for me to get it, to take it.
I have to though, which is difficult because there are responsibilities that I can’t put to the side for the time being. So in order to get theo-time, I need to put aside things that I don’t want to put aside, but that aren’t integrally responsible. Four more months of Mystery School and Magister-hood for the Brotherhood. Then I am taking time for myself. I need it, and I will have earned it.
